


Doctor Who: I wish I could despise you

by TARDIS_Type40_my_all_time_favourite1986



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Accidents, Alternate Universe, F/M, Falling In Love, First Meetings, Hate to Love, Love, Neighbors, Neighbours, Regret, Twelve/Clara - Freeform, Two Shot, whouffaldi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-17
Updated: 2020-01-17
Packaged: 2021-02-27 09:40:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,171
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22294963
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TARDIS_Type40_my_all_time_favourite1986/pseuds/TARDIS_Type40_my_all_time_favourite1986
Summary: ~A single moment can change someone's life. When Clara Oswald learns of the death of her best friend, she develops such hatred on the person who is responsible that she does everything to make life difficult for the person.But this is not going to be as easy as expected.~
Relationships: Twelfth Doctor/Clara Oswin Oswald
Kudos: 5





	Doctor Who: I wish I could despise you

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome to the new two-piece.
> 
> This time it's about how Clara lost Eleven but won Twelve, but it's even sadder because... Well, you'll find out in the first part.
> 
> Allons-Y
> 
> PS: Personally and also voluntarily, I do not have a driver's license, which will remain the same throughout my life.

Doctor Who: I wish I could despise you

2013/2014

Part One - The first six weeks

Period from December 25, 2013 to February 5, 2014

First week

On the evening of the first Christmas Day in London.

She never expected that a single call could tear her off her feet and the floor below her at the same time.

Well, it wasn't the call directly, but rather what she expected at the scene of the accident.

When she saw all the chaos, she didn't really pay attention to it, but only looked at the body, which was lying on the floor and covered with a tarp. She didn't have to ask what it meant, she knew it that way.

Among the onlookers, how could it be otherwise, there was a person standing a little apart, looking down and sinking his hands deep in the pockets of his... wizard's coat?...

But when she went to him, none of this mattered. The only thing she wanted to know was whether he was responsible for the accident.

He nodded, but said nothing. Of course she could see that he was shocked, maybe even paralyzed, by the event, but she didn't care. What did she care if he suffered for his deed.

(A week later he would eventually find out that she had reported him for murder, even if it wasn't. Yes, he was responsible for it, but he definitely didn't do it on purpose.)

But now nobody thought about what might be afterwards. Now the thoughts were entirely on the accident.

„Ma'am, did you know the deceased?“, Someone approached her, but she could only give a nod as an answer, she didn't feel able to do more.

„My condolences, you must have known him very well.“

Another nod, though she was beginning to wonder why she wasn't being left alone. Her best friend, a little crazy, with a penchant for bow-ties and unusual headgear, was dead, just like that, and she couldn't say how much she wanted it to be the one who had done this to her forever had to think like a nightmare that chased you awake.  
„Would you mind coming to the station tomorrow?“

No reaction. What should she say? That she was fine, that everything was fine? None of that... And much less of her state of mind.

When the scene of the accident was cleared, the man was still sitting on the stairs of the house, which was right next to it. Even now he was slumped and honestly, whoever knew him personally would not recognize him.

But at some point he also had to go home, in the truest sense of the word, but it seemed to him that the way was going to be damn long.

Great, 55 years old and he had destroyed one person's life with one wrong reaction (or was it something else?). Of course, he had seen how much it took her, but since he was down there with his own thoughts, he had no real nerve to think about how others were doing at that moment.

Second week

He should have expected this when he held the letter in his hands, but he would not avoid it, he would face it.

Even if he has had nightmares of what he had experienced and what he was to blame for the past few days.

Well, when he entered the building an hour later, he hadn't expected what would happen to him ... Who would have.

„This is for what you did to me.“  
„Doesn't give you the right to treat me like that. I couldn't have come here at all.“

She looked at her for a moment, but then turned away from him. He shouldn't speak to them more than necessary, otherwise they had nothing to do with each other.

When he even put a hand on her shoulder, she pushed it away.  
„Don't touch me in any way, understand? I don't want to have more contact with you than necessary.“

He only grunted before sitting somewhere else and waiting for him to be called.

„Is that why you're here to enjoy how I'm doing about this?“

„Addressing, unless there is no other way, is also prohibited.“

„You're pretty stubborn, you know that?“

This time she didn't answer him. First, because she no longer wanted to speak to him, and second, because they were now called on.

After explaining how it had happened an hour later, she looked at him before laughing.

„So you really want to tell me that it wasn't your intention to run over my best friend?“  
„Yes. Listen, I just remember that he suddenly stood in front of me and I had no time to react appropriately. I'm very sorry for your loss, but I can't just go back in time and undo everything.“

She just shook her head, which she then hid in her hands, hiding the tears that were fighting their way up.

She explained that she would not take the ad back and that he should always be reminded of what he is responsible for. He would take it ... In the very dumb hope that maybe one day she could forgive.

Third week

When he found out by accident that they lived in the same house (they had met in the stairwell), and did everything they could not repeat, he hadn't had a quiet night because she always had something at full volume, be it the television or music, it was kept constantly awake.

One evening, however, when she was also starting to drill, it was enough for him and he stood in front of his apartment faster (she lived directly below him) than he would have thought possible.

After ringing several times, she opened the door and he staggered back when he saw her sight. And honestly, she looked terrible.

„What do you want?“  
„Is everything alright with you?“  
„Mind your own business? And why are you here at all? I said I wanted to have as little contact as possible.“

„And I finally want to sleep through the night again without having to be in bed every time, just because you start the damn drill in the evening.“

Suddenly she had drawn him towards her and her mouths were very close. He was breathing heavily when he realized she could kiss him.

„Just leave me alone until the first negotiations are over. Until then you have to get along.“

She pushed him away and then just closed the door, leaving him outside.

Where did he have his electric guitar again?

The next few days it went on, wondering why none of the other neighbors complained. It couldn't matter that there was actually a senseless argument between them.

Fourth week

And this argument continued, even if both of them now knew how nonsensical everything was, neither of them wanted to give up. And if only for that reason... Yes for what?

Was it the original reason that they kept their argument going or was it something else that nobody wanted to admit to?

And yet it went on, only when they met in the stairwell did neither speak a word to each other, but avoided each other as quickly as possible.

It was really stupid, but they were pretty stubborn too. So much so that there were rumors in the area. Either it was said that they had an affair in secret, or people said that one had murdered the other. Which, of course, was pretty nonsense, since in that case the argument would have stopped and two apartments would have been empty.

Noises, but this time neither music nor the television. No this time, the kind that almost drove him crazy. She had a visitor and it was precisely this visit that annoyed him so much.

However, the question arose why he felt that way. He didn't like her, so why doesn't he want anything more than to run down and drag the guy from her. He wanted to be the one who gave it to her. He wanted to sink his cock into her so much that she would scream out loud.

Damn, it wasn't supposed to be that way! He didn't like her, he shouldn't develop feelings for her and yet he did, he fell in love with her.

Crap and double crap! As if she was smiling happily at him and fell into his arms just to return his feelings. He had to hold back not to laugh out loud.

But here he was, 55 years old and in love with a woman who was so many years younger. Why did they only get to know each other properly after the stupid accident, even though they have been neighbours for a few years?

Oh well, he was old enough to get his emotions under control and it probably won't be long before they dissolve in the wind.

Fifth week

You had someone!

She really had someone who visited her every day... It had to be that way, because nothing had been heard from her apartment for days. And the guy probably didn't like the way she behaved. Although he couldn't imagine that she could be told anything.

But as far as his feelings for her were concerned, his hopes had not been fulfilled. On the contrary, he worried about her every day. Wondered how she was, if she was feeling well... He had to get some fresh air, couldn't stay here anymore.

But when he was standing in front of her door a little later, he couldn't help ringing the bell, and a little later she opened the door.  
„What do you want?“  
„That!“, He grabbed her, pulled her close and kissed her so hard that her eyes widened in alarm. When he released her, he breathed heavily.

„Nobody will give you as much as I want to do!“  
„What do you mean by that?“  
„It drives me crazy when you have a visitor! I go crazy when I have to keep hearing why this visit is there and in these moments I want nothing more than to pull the guy off of you.“

She stared at. Was he really jealous? It couldn't be.  
„You are jealous?“  
„I'm in love with you“, he said softly, but still clearly enough, „I'm in love with you, understand? I know I have no right to do so, but even if I tried to ignore these feelings, they just don't go away.“

With that, he turned away and ran down the stairs, still standing in shock at the door and barely able to process what he had just given her.

The days passed until the weekend and they hadn't seen each other since his confession. However he did it, they just didn't see each other.

What she had no idea was that he hadn't left his apartment for days and was almost a wreck. He was in bed all the time, only got up when he had to and otherwise lost himself in pity.

Who could have guessed how much his life could change within a few weeks.

Clara was worried. Another appointment would have been on the way to the police station today, but he couldn't stop by.

„Aren't you going to tell us why you are here anyway, Miss Oswald?“

She shook her head. She didn't want it without him. So Clara got up, thanked her, and made her way back. She wanted to clarify it with him, but she didn't want to do it if he wasn't there.

Sixth week

He knew, of course, that she wanted to talk to him about something, but after his confession he couldn't face her. It would be an embarrassing encounter where none of them knew what to say.

Besides... If she could see him, she would get quite a shock. He just manages to shave every few days, but otherwise he looked really terrible.

The only problem was that he was afraid. Afraid of losing everything even though he had nothing to lose... well, except for the woman he loved.

Whatever she wanted from him, it couldn't be a good thing.

They had known each other for six weeks, the accident happened six weeks ago, and so much and so little had changed during all this time.

Did it just feel that way or did he really seem to be burning inside? He couldn't even answer himself, and all he felt was emptiness.

Great, wasn't it always said that being in love would be the greatest feeling ever? Whoever spread such nonsense never had to go through what he was doing.

And it was far too much for him to continue to bear.

So there were two options for him. Either he finished it permanently or he went to her and cleared it completely. But however he decided, it would never be easy.

**********

That would be the first six weeks over, but how will it go on now? We will find out in the next part.


End file.
